It's Saturday Night!

It's a crazy night around here. We have an extra kid until tomorrow afternoon. My nephew, Brandon, is spending the night and going to church with us tomorrow. Ben is happy as a clam because Brandon is his best friend.

I have had another day of both good and not-so-good decisions. I went for my walk with my friend and our dogs this morning. We walked for about 45 minutes. Then I came home, took a shower and Brandon got dropped off. When my sister brought him over, she also dropped off a big bunch of chocolate chip cookies (my favorite!). So I ate way too many cookies. I ate a decent lunch and dinner, though.

My nurturing was talking with my friend, got some exercise, made a good food decision by not eating anything after dinner, and I'm even remembering to make my blog post! 

Well, I'm off to watch a "scary" movie with these little boys. I hope your evening is as full of fun as mine!

Thursday, January 29

Good evening, friends! 

I'm still plugging along. I went to bed last night having not remembered to make my blog post. I am still working to make this a daily habit. On Wednesday I dressed for the gym and ended up with a headache and stayed home. I am having a hard time convincing myself to go back to the gym. 

I do have good news, though! My eating habits are improving quite a bit. I am making better choices each day and staying away from both sugar and artificial sweeteners. I nurtured myself by spending some quiet time alone. 

Today's report isn't great. I didn't go to the gym, but I met a friend for a breakfast date. It was very good for me and nurturing. The kids had a half day of school and orthodontist appointments (two!) in the afternoon. We had a healthy vegetarian dinner, and now here I am, back at the library with my middle school book team meeting. Oh, and somewhere in there I broke my no sugar rule by getting a Coke Slurpee at 7-11. 

What does all this mean? It means I'm succeeding, then failing, then making some good choices, then making some bad choices. I keep trying, though, and I keep forgiving myself, then starting another new day. I never imagined I would begin this plan and then follow it perfectly. I just need to keep trying to make more good choices than bad. 

I'm not trying to be perfect, just better. 

I'll see you again tomorrow, the kids have another half day so my schedule will be thrown off. I'll just keep on working at it!

Enjoy your evening!

Tuesday, January 26

Just a quick update for tonight because I'm tired and ready for bed. I followed my no sugar plan, I spent time reading for my nurturing, and I went to yoga tonight (which apparently kicked my butt!)

Tomorrow I will go to the gym!

Have a great night!

A good, normal day

It was a good day! I didn't go to the gym, but I went for a 45 minute walk with the dog. I stuck to my no sugar plan, and logged my food in the My Fitness Pal app. 

I stayed home today (except for dropping kids off at school, and a quick return trip to the middle school to drop off some forgotten gym clothes). I got a lot of cleaning and some paperwork done. I love checking things off my to-do list!  

I talked with a friend and took plenty of cleaning breaks to nurture myself.

All in all, it was a pretty good day.  I hope you had a good day too! Enjoy your Monday evening!

Oh, I forgot to mention that it's a special day at our house: our pup, Violet, is three years old today. She got lots of treats and a nice walk for her birthday. We love you, Violet! 

It's Sunday Night...

...and I need to report on my weekend!  Since I didn't make a post about Friday or Saturday, I'll cover those as well as today.

Friday I still felt pretty tired and achy, so I rested up in anticipation of my night out with my nephew, Kevin. I didn't work out, I ate a very reasonable breakfast and lunch since I knew I was going out for dinner and that we might have dessert. I also didn't do my blog post. I nurtured myself by going out with Kevin, one of my favorite people.

On Saturday I went back to my weekly dog walking session with a friend, so I actually got some exercise! Yay! We walked for about 45 minutes.Then I nurtured myself by doing pretty close to nothing else for the entire day. I ate too many cookies, but my good food decision was to have small portions at lunch and dinner.

Today I went to church (my nurturing for the day), then came home and did the weekly grocery shopping. My good food decision for the day is to not eat anything after dinner. And as of now, after dinner,  I count it as a weekday so no more sugar until Friday night. Now that the grocery shopping is done for the week I'll have no excuse to stay home from the gym tomorrow . I don't want to jinx myself but I think maybe, just maybe, I may be over this virus!

Happy Sunday ought to you! Here's to a great week to come!

Pure Joy

I stirred the spaghetti, threw together a salad, and set out plates while pausing to send texts back and forth to Kevin, Sue's oldest child. We coordinated our schedules and firmed up our plans. 

"Leaving now to pick you up!" I texted, as I gave my four kids some last minute instructions. Hoping that they would remember what I needed each of them to do while I was gone, I slid behind the wheel of my freezing cold van and pulled out of the driveway. As I drove carefully along our icy neighborhood roads, my heart and mind changed gears. I left the role of "mom" and switched over to "aunt".

It's one of the greatest pleasures of my life, being an aunt, and I don't set aside as much time to focus on it as I should. But the drive allowed me a few minutes to think about what being an aunt has meant to me. My mind ran like a film projector, images of Kevin as a cuddly newborn, a chubby-faced toddler learning to say "Auntie!",  a fourth grader excitedly telling me stories about his teacher... 

Then, some hard memories: I remember stopping to check on him while his mom lay dying in the next room.  I picture snuggling next to him on the couch as he tried to begin to process the news he had heard moments before, "She's gone".  I can recall the pain on his face as I glanced down at him while I was delivering his mother's eulogy.

We have been through a lot, our family, this boy and me. And today he turns 18. He's an adult now. It makes no sense, he was just a tiny, chicken-legged creature who fit perfectly in my arms. But it makes complete sense, this boy who studies hard every day, all the time, who plans to become a doctor, has the life experience of a much older person. He handles all life has given him with grace, humility, and humor.

We set out to begin our evening, just the two of us. There are plans to eat dinner at one of his mom's favorite restaurants, then see a movie. Later we find ourselves sipping root beer floats, and flitting from topic to topic. Our discussions range from an in-depth critique of the movie, to how we each handle our day to day struggles with grief. 

He hugs me goodbye as I drop him off at his door, and I wait to be sure he gets safely inside. And as I drive away, I let the tears slip down both of my cheeks. But this time I am not feeling sadness and despair. This time the tears are tiny drops of pure thankfulness and joy at the gift my sister has left me, the gift of being Auntie.

Realizations

Good evening, friends. I come to you tonight from the library, as I allow my middle school "Battle of the Books" team to engage in discussion without me. 

I have come to some realizations today:

1.  I am still sick. I am not being lazy, sloth-like, or irresponsible. I'm generally a person with a lot of energy, but this past week and a half I keep finding the need to collapse into the couch, several times a day.

2. Because I'm still sick, and honestly, even if I wasn't, I need to be forgiving to myself about my lack of progress. I've been reading about establishing new habits (check out all books by Gretchen Rubin!) and have discovered that people who readily forgive themselves for their mistakes are more likely to stick to their goals in the long term.

3. Therefore, I'm not doing well with my exercise but it's going to be okay.

I nurtured myself today by talking to a dear friend (and possibly the entire audience of this blog--hi Donna!).  I made several good food decisions (easier to do with an upset stomach!) and I am writing my daily blog entry.

All is well. When I feel good enough to go back to the gym, I will absolutely do that. In the meantime, I'm watching many recorded episodes of a show called "My 600-lb Life". If that isn't good motivation, then nothing is!

Enjoy your evening! See you tomorrow!